"AHA!"

Thanks for popping in!  

Wow...it's been a while hasn't it?  I sincerely apologize for the longer gaps between posts...glad you have been faithful to check in anyhow. : )  

(I wrote this post a couple of days ago and am now getting around to posting it.)

This morning I had one of those "aha" moments.  I was reading through an article on "Love and Respect in Marriage" by Ken Sande in preparation for a pre-marital counseling session we have in a couple weeks.  Trust me, I don't normally prepare so well in advance, truth be told I am actually more of a procrastinator.   Since the article was sitting here by our computer desk I happened to pick it up and got absorbed....actually having time to read since my kiddos were still in their morning "chill" mode.  Now they are upstairs playing and I have time to write to you - bonus!!

SO anyhow, about my "aha".   This feels like something I should have already grasped after 2 weeks shy of 12 years of marriage and a much longer time of knowing Christ, but whether it was the wording of the author or a clean spot God prepared in my heart and mind OR the combination, something clicked for me.  

WARNING: this is a sensitive topic for MANY women...ok probably ALL.  For those brave enough to read on...you have been fairly notified.  

Submission.  There I said it.  Still want to read?

Excellent!  Thanks for sticking with me. : )  Have you ever before linked our struggles with submission as women to a result of the Fall?  Maybe this is something you have already figured out but humor me as I bask in the newness of this revelation.  There is an actual, historically accurate reason that submission is a difficult concept for the human race as a whole.  It's called the Fall, that epic and tragic incident when man rejected God's perfect, wonderful plan for a taste of independent power.  Man and Woman were both created in God's image into a beautiful, fulfilling plan of mutual love and respect and the lure and belief of one terrible lie derailed and marred it.  We have been living with the consequences ever since and our views of love and submission continue to be distorted.  Did you know the "desire for her husband" that God speaks of to Eve in Genesis 3:16 is not talking about attraction or passion but it is the same word used to describe, in other portions of Scripture, an unhealthy and destructive desire to control?  Does that word sound familiar to you?? Yikes, it does to me! 

Submission isn't distasteful to us as women today because it is culturally irrelevant and archaic (which is just another sneaky lie).  It's because we are cursed with a sinful urge to dominate and master and it affects everyone and everything in our lives.  I find it frustrating how easily I lose perspective in daily living with my family and much of the time my need for control is the culprit.  Controlling attitudes, behavior and sometimes even personality.  Controlling circumstances and schedules in the way I feel is best.  There ends up being a whole lot of me in the midst of it all.  Aaahhh!  When I think about it long enough it actually feels like this heavy weight I end up carrying around that would feel so much better if I put it down.   Hmm....maybe that's part of God's beautiful purpose in surrender...that ugly word we don't like to use...submission.